A Message to Me in Front of Beautiful Moms!

Last night our family was asked to come and visit at the Autism Society Meeting. The topic was how to make playgroups and hangouts for teens with Autism. We have presented in many places but Ryan really struggled last night.. calming down and getting his thoughts out. He was hitting back the letterboard  and so so slow with pointing.  After it was all over, I realized many things..

See what these folks didn't know... the reason for the struggle was his thoughts were recalling a very difficult part of his life. He has shared for many years now, privately to me, what took place in school.  How people kicked him and  teachers didn't want him in their classroom and aids were cruel. But  don't be sad.. There were kind folks too in that time in his life... Ryan is so  happy now and his life is whole and positive.... so have joy over that!!
Back to the night.. his words painstakingly came out letter by letter and... he answered my question what do you think of your guy group( 5 guy friends they hangout) and he said
YES TO HEALING ARE FRIENDS... then struggling he said.. .  I AM INTENSE MOM... I tried to talk and calm him..
Then I said is  there something else you want to tell us about friends..... you know you can tell me anything Ryan.... and I wish I could remember all he said but this is the words that I wrote letter by letter on the paper when he was pointing:
RYAN NOT RIGHT. SEE MOM YESTERDAY LOST.   NO LITTLE CHILDREN REALLY LIKED SON ........
Ugh at that moment, it all came flooding back...I was thinking about his  good life NOW and he started with when he was young and life brought him sadness.

So I changed focus  and I said...."yeah Ryan... I understand. Mom loves you.... maybe lets talk about  now your guy group and I named them all... yeah.. what about that, he said,
MOM RYAN ........ I GET LOVING KIND PEACEFUL FRIENDS SO HAPPY...
and I cant remember the rest.. yes... I was so relieved... he is OK... he is happy... my heart was so grateful at that moment those words came out...

Wow....we made it through the night.. without him crying..this night in front of those sweet MOMs.. I didn't want to make them sad...I did not think Ryan would share his feelings  in that way...

So.. sitting there, I  told those  Moms.. see the Good in there child and in the moment. ...

So what do  I see?..  Reflecting on last night...I see the Good in his life....

 And  here was my message from my son...

 My  beautiful, brave son  is getting stronger to be able to express darkness in his life and to be able to come to me and share these hardships.   I could hug him and encourage him and  I had the privilege to remind him  to see hope and the light of a new day..to see a good life .....

Thank you guy group.. you know who you are for being Ryan's friends..
Thank you beautiful gracious Moms... for listening to Ryan.....

 Believe for more and know God loves us and walks us thru to the victory and gives us joy in the morning...